“How about a pizza and movie night?” I texted into my phone to Jeff.
I really didn’t feel like making dinner. Heck, I don’t feel like making dinner most nights but it’s something that has to be done. There are only so many nights a week that I can convince the kids that cereal really is not just for breakfast.
Beside, it was Friday. I’ll make dinner all through the week but come the weekend, I want to be done. In fact, cooking on the weekend should be outlawed unless the restaurant is doing it.
“Had pizza for lunch but sure” my phone beeped with Jeff’s response.
Hot damn. I just figured out dinner.
“Hey, kids!” I yelled causing them to all run to me, “How about a family movie night?”
Yay!!!!” they all screamed and started jumping around.
I smiled at their excitement. I had to admit, I was pretty excited too. It’s just a little something, eating pizza on the floor in front of the TV, but it’s us… all together just being a family. And it’s fun until someone knocks over a drink, steps in the pizza and kicks a sibling in the head but that is beside the point.
“Ok, grab your shoes… let’s go to the video store.” I said getting my purse and keys.
The kids scrambled to find their shoes and then one by one got into the van an belted up.
We don’t really need to go to the video store to get a movie. We have Netflix and Direct TV and goodness knows, when we rent a video we always end up with late fees but there is just something about going into the video store that I like.
It reminds me of when I was kid. First my parents taking me and my brother and sister there on Friday nights to pick out movies then going there with friends to find the scariest movie we were allowed to watch. The video store was where I was asked out on my very first date. He asked me to watch a movie with me while at the video store. Original, huh?
I just like going. I think it’s along the same lines as why I like going to the library. With eReaders and online books, I don’t really need books or the library but I still go. I want to hold that book in my hands and it’s the same with the DVDs.
“Mommy, can we get two bideos?” Quinn asked
“Oh and maybe a Wii game? Please, mommy… Please!” Jake chimed in and begged.
“No, no games,” I said as I held the door open for them to enter the store. “And we will see about getting 2 movies.”
When we entered the store the kids scattered, Hayden and Jake to the video game section, Quinn to the animal section and Claire to drool over Spider Man. I went to walk the wall of all the new release to see if I could find that magical movie that would entertain the kids while not making Jeff and I want to slowly remove our eye balls with spoons.
I took a DVD off the shelf to look at it when Quinn came up and stood be side me. He didn’t say anything, just stood there, kind of dancing around and every now again touching his boys parts.
“Do you have to go potty?” I asked setting down the DVD.
“No,” he said matter of factly.
“Really?” I said as he now stood beside me legs crossed, hand holding himself, totally doing the ‘I gotta pee’ dance. “How about we find a bathroom?”
I took his hand and we walked to the back of the store. There were two doors down a small hall. One was closed and one was half open. I pushed Quinn into the half open one to go into the bathroom alone, while I stood by the door and kept an eye out of the other kids.
Quinn was in the room for a few minutes and then returned still doing the ‘I gotta pee’ dance.
“Did you go?” I asked.
He shook his head.
I began to get annoyed with him because why in the world would he go into the bathroom and not pee? What in the world was he doing in there?
I opened the door wide to check things out and gasped.
As it turns out, I did not push my newly 6 year old son into the bathroom but into the ‘adult only’ porn room of the video store.
I slinked back into the hall, closing the door and quickly opening the other one which thank God, was an actual bathroom.
Then I waited, chewing on my nail. I knew he was in that room long enough to see things. I knew he was an observant child. I knew he was going to say something.
“Mommy” he said
Oh Lord, here it comes.
“Why was that lady licking that man’s penis?” he asked.
Bam. There is was. And straight to the point.
I answered in the only way possible, “Because. Now why don’y you go pick out some candy but no lollipops.”